Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Marlo » June 3rd, 2015, 9:20 pm

I don't know if this is just my area, but most of the time, I get fortunes that aren't fortunes -- and I'll post examples of what I mean. From another thread, I thought of us just posting our fortune cookies and adding the whole "in bed" or "in my pants" funny joke, BUT, WE'RE WRITERS AND I'M LOOKING FOR MORE GAMES. so i figured we could quote our original fortunes -- if they're whack. If it's a good fortune, keep that nonsense and put it in your wallet for good luck. -- and rewrite them to make them better!

Here are the few gems that have collected on my refrigerator over the years:

Wish you happiness.


Your emotional nature is strong and sensitive.


When two men in a business always agree, one of them is unnecessary.


The issue isn't what you're saying; mostly, it's the way.


The world is always ready to receive talent with opens arms.


This is not a day to take risks. Diplomacy rules today.


And my personal favorite…

Only listen to fortune cookie, disregard all other fortune telling units.



Now, Webster Dictionary defines a "fortune" as:

1
often capitalized : a hypothetical force or personified power that unpredictably determines events and issues favorably or unfavorably

2
obsolete : accident, incident

3
a : prosperity attained partly through luck : success
b : luck 1
c plural : the turns and courses of luck accompanying one's progress (as through life) <her fortunes varied but she never gave up>

4
: destiny, fate <can tell your fortune>; also : a prediction of fortune

5
a : riches, wealth <a man of fortune>
b : a store of material possessions <the family fortune>
c : a very large sum of money <spent a fortune redecorating>



And "fortune cookie" as:

:a thin cookie folded to contain a slip of paper on which is printed a fortune, proverb, or humorous statement


That's all fine and well, but then I ask myself -- to the mirror, why yes I do -- and you might ask, "Aimee, where the eff did fortune cookies come from because I sure as shell don't know!" Me either, until I looked it up.

According to THIS WEBSITE , one source I've used in my short-term research:

Fortune cookies became common in Chinese restaurants after World War II. Desserts were not traditionally part of Chinese cuisine, and the cookies thus offered Americans something familiar with an exotic flair.


Each cookie contained a strip of paper with an inspirational Bible scripture on it, written for Jung by a Presbyterian minister.


So what happened to these inspirational and "fortune" -esque writings and who writes them now if not these thankful creators?

According to another SOURCE :

However, back at Wonton Foods, even Lau could not keep up with 5 million per day. Wonton Food, Inc. pays a team of freelance writers to keep the messages new and fresh. Every couple of years, the contracted writers renew and refresh Wonton Foods' database of 15,000 messages. Sounds like a fun gig for any creative writer.

Today there are blogs dedicated to the history and art of writing fortune cookie fortunes. A lot of time, effort and research seems to go into crafting unique pieces of ten words or less.

Interestingly, fortune cookie fortunes are an American phenomena. Chinese restaurant owners in American would not dream of serving you or handing you a bag of takeout that did not include the little treats. In China, however, it is neither expected nor common.


So what I'm getting is, it's a bunch of funny people like us making jokes and getting paid for it. :|

How do you apply for this job or send in your own quips, you ask?!

Check out these links. BE FREE, MY FRIENDS.

Careers with writing fortunes:
http://www.ehow.com/info_8698915_averag ... riter.html
http://www.thefrisky.com/photos/10-drea ... ne-cookie/
http://www.kaystrom.com/blog/good-luck- ... ne-cookies
http://bookdirtblog.blogspot.com/2011/1 ... iters.html
https://books.google.com/books?id=DHHJW ... ie&f=false
http://www.jobs.net/article/cb-196-tale ... -industry/

Additional information on fortune cookies:
http://mentalfloss.com/article/50610/wh ... ne-cookies
http://www.foxnews.com/leisure/2014/05/ ... e-cookies/
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/01/16/trave ... d=all&_r=0



ANYWAY. I'm still going to try my hand at rewording at least one, to rewrite the only one that I kept that I don't view as a fortune. (I throw most of the "non-fortunes" away. :lol: )

Original:
Wish you happiness.


Rewrite:
Time spent craving and working will be rewarded.


WHAT ABOUT YOU GUYS? I KNOW I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE WITH AN ADDICTION TO TAKE-OUT.
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Aziza » June 3rd, 2015, 11:02 pm

Actual fortune cookie paper that I still have in my wallet: "About time I got out of that cookie."
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Marlo » June 3rd, 2015, 11:06 pm

Aziza wrote:Actual fortune cookie paper that I still have in my wallet: "About time I got out of that cookie."





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OHMYGOD. THIS IS MY NEW JOB. IM GOING TO DO IT.
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Aziza » June 3rd, 2015, 11:28 pm

Marlo wrote:
Aziza wrote:Actual fortune cookie paper that I still have in my wallet: "About time I got out of that cookie."





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OHMYGOD. THIS IS MY NEW JOB. IM GOING TO DO IT.

For proof - CLICK ME
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Jaenelle » June 4th, 2015, 1:02 pm

Aziza wrote:
Marlo wrote:
Aziza wrote:Actual fortune cookie paper that I still have in my wallet: "About time I got out of that cookie."





Image


OHMYGOD. THIS IS MY NEW JOB. IM GOING TO DO IT.

For proof - CLICK ME


I laughed at that Gif for a solid 5 minutes, got weird looks, justified it with the Fortune picture...everyone understood. :lol: 8-)
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby ophelia » June 4th, 2015, 1:07 pm

Stop eating, you too fat.

I still haven't gotten past that one. Even the fortune cookies are giant assholes these days ><
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Re: Fortune Cookie; Rewrite Challenge

Postby Marlo » June 4th, 2015, 7:57 pm

Jaenelle wrote:
I laughed at that Gif for a solid 5 minutes, got weird looks, justified it with the Fortune picture...everyone understood. :lol: 8-)



YES! I only recently found out where it's from. The IT Crowd. AND OMG. I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD AT A SHOW IN MY LIFE. I HATE THAT IT WAS SO SHORT. IT WAS FREAKING GENIUS.

ophelia wrote:Stop eating, you too fat.

I still haven't gotten past that one. Even the fortune cookies are giant assholes these days ><



;kgljfd
OH MY GOD
THAT'S A REAL FORTUNE?! THAT ISN'T A FORTUNE! THAT'S A BELLIGERANT DRUNK. GO HOME FORTUNE COOKIE, YOU'RE DRUNK. AND RUDE.
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